1. DOGS

The first time we met you were a kennel maid,
You gave me a tip I got me forecast paid,
You were holding a greyhound in trap number one,
Your white coat was shining in the afternoon sun.

Now we're both together,
We're never gonna break apart, no no,
'Cause we're a happy couple you and me,
With a greyhound at either knee.

I'll have ten shillings to win on Camera Flash, young man,
What dog's that, it's a deuce, look at it.

There was nothing in my life bigger than beer,
There was nothing in my life bigger than beer,
'Ceptin' you, little darling,
'Ceptin' you, little darling,
We're a happy couple you and me,
With a greyhound at either knee.

We go to the dog track on Saturday night,
We put all our money on a dog that we like,
A kiss and a cuddle, a hot meat pie,
Two dollar tickets and a starry sky.

There was nothing in my life bigger than beer,
There was nothing in my life bigger than beer,
'Ceptin' you, little darling,
'Ceptin' you, little darling,
We're a happy couple you and me,
With a baby on either knee.

Yes it's you little darling,
Yes it's you little darling,
Now it's you little darling,
Now it's you.

Girl, where's me wage packet ?????,
Ah I'll put twenty-five knicker please on Gallop Printer,
Oh, I hope the wife don't find out,
Yes, it's sure to win, isn't it,
Yes, I know, it's a good dog, I saw it run at White City,
Just last week, broke the record, Gallop Printer,
Nice dog, yes, lovely form, lovely buttocks.


2. CALL ME LIGHTNING

See that girl who's smiling so brightly,
Well I reckon she's cool and I reckon rightly,
She's good looking and I ain't frightened,
I'm gonna show you why they call me lightning.

Hey little girl who's dancing so lightly,
My XKE is shining so brightly,
The noose around us is slowly tightening,
I'm gonna show you why they call me lightning.

Hey little girl who's dancing so lightly,
My XKE is shining so brightly,
The noose around us is slowly tightening,
I'm gonna show you why they call me lightning.

You can't catch me, I'm as fast as can be,
Call me lightning, I'm as fast as can be,
No you can't catch me, no you can't catch me