Marilia Adamaki : Gloomy

Gothic Rock / Greece
(2019 - Self-Released)
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Тексты песен


1.I Want To Leave

I didn't mean to offend you
But that's what you're lately doing
I was just speaking my mind
You never accept the truth...

I just said I don't feel free
This is not the life I need
Don't try to tell me what to think
You keep saying words
That aren't interesting to me
Well excuse me if I want to leave...

I can't speak to you
You never really pay attention
It's not something new
You've always given me that impression...

I just said I don't feel free
This is not the life I need
Don't try to tell me what to think
You keep saying words
That aren't interesting to me
Well excuse me if I want to leave...

I know exactly how you'll react
That's why I usually don't start
Just respect I'm not at the age
Of ending up in a grave...

I just said I don't feel free
This is not the life I need
Don't try to tell me what to think
You keep saying words
That aren't interesting to me
Well excuse me if I want to leave...

You expect me to act like you are
But you're much older than I am
Such a shame that it's going to end this way
I want to be me someday
Staying here is a mistake
Hope you'll forgive me one day...

2.Weep

My mood changes violently
One minute I'm sad
The other I'm angry
One second I'm mad
And then I look happy

It's never normal
It always looks extreme
And it's tough
To putting up with it

I'm not okay
I never claimed to be
So don't ask me
How do I really feel
It can be tiring living with me
And I'm thankful that you are helping me

I'm all dressed up
In such enthusiasm
And suddenly I won't leave the house
I'm about to lock myself up
And never go out

I'm always failing at smiling
Cause it always looks forced
So I stopped trying
Cause it doesn't worth

I'm not okay
I never claimed to be
So don't ask me
How do I really feel
It can be tiring living with me
And I'm thankful that you are helping me

I love crying in crowded places like trains
Where nobody is asking me if I'm okay
I like hiding behind my glasses and hat
So no one can see how miserable I really am
And I can cry anywhere and so bad
But nobody is actually aware of that

I'm not okay
I never claimed to be
So don't ask me
How do I really feel
It can be tiring living with me
And I'm thankful that you are helping me

And every time I sleep
My problems haunting me
And then I start to weep
Till I can barely breathe
Insomnia takes the wheel
And it's the worst thing

3.Harm

You don't know what it's like to have depression
You can't imagine how it is to live with this obsession
Of trying to keep things under protection
And taking unimportant words into consideration

You only live to do harm
You think your actions don't have a result
Amusing when you treat me so bad
Cause deep inside you feel like that
And definitely you are

Someone must have rejected you
Since you were really young
They made you feel useless,obnoxious and sad
So that's when you started acting bad
Or even worse you were born like that
And no one ever showed you
How you supposed to react
What a pity your brain is not enough

You only live to do harm
You think your actions don't have a result
Amusing when you treat me so bad
Cause deep inside you feel like that
And definitely you are

My level is much higher than yours
And I never believed in your words
Cause I'm so smart to be able to understand
I'm a talented singer and you are?
What you are...yeah no one!

You only live to do harm
You think your actions don't have a result
Amusing when you treat me so bad
Cause deep inside you feel like that
And definitely you are

4.Hypocrisy

You can keep saying your words
But they mean nothing to me
Cause I'm smarter than you think
And you will ever be
What is good for you
Is not that good for me
So simply let me live
And get me out of this trip

I hear and see this thing
But I don't understand anything
You can't force me to do this
You're talking for freedom but where is it
There's no point in believing in something you can't see
Enough with the hypocrisy

So should I forget
My main purpose on this earth
And like all of you pretend
Or ask for help instead
I only believe what with my own eyes I can see
Not confusing illusions or unrealistic dreams
I need to get out of this

I hear and see this thing
But I don't understand anything
You can't force me to do this
You're talking for freedom but where is it
There's no point in believing in something you can't see
Enough with the hypocrisy

I won't act like you want
In your world I refuse to belong
So don't pretend someone
We both know you're not

Don't try to teach me
What's right or not
And no I won't change
I'd rather be depressed and ashamed
Cause for you sadness is a shame

I hear and see this thing
But I don't understand anything
You can't force me to do this
You're talking for freedom but where is it
There's no point in believing in something you can't see
Enough with the hypocrisy

5.Lost In My Dark World

All paths lead to this road
It just takes one decision
I can't do this anymore

I tried to fight it but I can't
Guess I'm not brave enough
I'm going to make it stop
Cause life becomes and more hard

I don't know why I'm trying
I don't know what I'm doing anymore
Everything leads to disappointment and failure
And I only feel lost in my dark world

Please release me from this
I need to go find a better place
Here with myself I'm not safe
I only fantasize about passing away

I don't know why I'm trying
I don't know what I'm doing anymore
Everything leads to disappointment and failure
And I only feel lost in my dark world

There might be a day
When I'll achieve what I've been fighting for
But it won't feel the same
Cause nothing matters for me no more
It's clear to see there's nothing left of me
I'm tormenting myself trying to live
Is it ever going to end
To be fine I can't pretend

I don't know why I'm trying
I don't know what I'm doing anymore
Everything leads to disappointment and failure
And I only feel lost in my dark world

6.Reveal

Sorry,I can't be what you want me to be
I can try to pretend but it's getting tiring
Forgive me,I don't know if I want us to meet
Cause everytime we end up fighting

I'm tired of pretending
I'm sick of waiting
My real self I will reveal
There's nothing normal about me
I can't pretend anymore
This fake theatre won't save us all
I hate myself more than I could ever hate anyone else
I hate me so much and nothing is enough

I'll do what you expect of me
Every day,every hour,whenever you ask me
I'll act exactly how you want me to
But after several times
It's starting to affect my mind
And like insane I scream and cry and wish to die
Cause I like being extreme

I'm tired of pretending
I'm sick of waiting
My real self I will reveal
There's nothing normal about me
I can't pretend anymore
This fake theatre won't save us all
I hate myself more than I could ever hate anyone else
I hate me so much and nothing is enough

I will follow you around
Wherever,everywhere you go
I have no life of my own
I don't want company
But I don't want to be alone
So I keep doing things I don't want

7.Bullies

Hey bullies I know what you're doing
I pretend I don't care but I see it
Hey bullies I really wish you well
I wish you my depression,my anxiety
My panic attacks,my fears and my despair...

Hey take a look at me
I know you don't like what you see
Just look where I am
And then where you are
I know it makes you sad
You're nothing and I'm above
I know you hate me for that
You're no one and I'm someone!

Hey bullies don't you ever have enough
Don't you think it's time to make it stop
You'll never make me stop I'm only at the start
I remember when you threatened me
And cursed me until death
Well guess what you're gonna die first instead
Hey listen I'm wishing you the best
My life is nothing but a living hell
Yours will be like that as well
If it's not yet...

Hey take a look at me
I know you don't like what you see
Just look where I am
And then where you are
I know it makes you sad
You're nothing and I'm above
I know you hate me for that
You're no one and I'm someone!


I really want to see your face
When I'll finally win this race
And when everyone will know my name
I'll be successful and you'll feel afraid
Hey bullies do you want me to commit suicide
Will you force me to take my own life
I used to be suicidal for so long
But for you I'll change my mind
You can't make me die!

Hey take a look at me
I know you don't like what you see
Just look where I am
And then where you are
I know it makes you sad
You're nothing and I'm above
I know you hate me for that
You're no one and I'm someone!

Hey bullies I wish you my violent dreams
My bloody nightmares and my denial to live
And for the end I really wish you someone
Who will make you feel the way you did to me
And after that a peaceful eternal sleep...



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