The Crüxshadows : The Mystery of the Whisper

Darkwave / USA
(1999 - Dancing Ferret Discs)
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1. ISIS AND OSIRIS (LIFE/DEATH)

(Instrumental)


2. CRUELTY

Mother of motion, the eyes can't capture time,
Falling emotion, the blind now lead the blind,
We commit indiscretions, and omit our sins from sight,
In a world of intangibles, too many things seem right

No hand to scribe, the sinking sickness I have seen,
No face to judge until you've been the monster I have been,

To hunger is noble, where beauty is silent sleep,
My hunger is noble, but my pain is driven deep.

Your cruelty and consequence cannot eliminate this Relevance
Your selfishness, your hatefulness cannot take away my
Immanence
Your cruelty and consequence cannot eliminate this Relevance
Your selfishness, your hatefulness cannot take away my
Innocence from me


Mother of motion, the eyes can't capture time,
Falling emotion, the blind now lead the blind,
To hunger is noble, where beauty is silent sleep,
My hunger is noble, but my pain is driven deep.


3. LEAVE ME ALONE

Leave me alone- I'm a freak
Leave me alone- make it easy for yourself

Everywhere I go they all stare
I don't understand why they care
They stare at me all in black
And when I turn they stare at my back
All these things can't,
All these things don't...
Let me go.
Leave me alone- I'm a freak
leave me alone- make it easy for yourself

Everywhere I go they all stare
I don't understand why they care
And I don't want to be part of your world
And I don't want to see the things you see
Can't you understand how I feel?
Can't you let me be?

Leave, leave me alone
Leave, leave me alone

Leave, leave me alone
Leave, leave me alone


4. INSOMNIA

You're lying awake
The room is different the walls dissolve
Replaced by sky
Horizon blackening twilight

Beckoning
As the clouds are stretching wide
Little holes
That light is clawing to get through
But hope is shifting
With the shadows
That are drifting on the ceiling as you move

Are you awake???

Sour thoughts are dancing now
All around your head
Shoulders shake... chattering teeth
The cold wind rips the covers from
Your bed
The apparition-
The eyes are digging
Heart is pounding
Eyelids will not close

Your voice is failing
The screams derailing
And she stands so near to you

And nothing is sweeter than the songs you're
Seeing
Begging for the colder hand she hides
Floating
Flowing

Her soul is hunting
Glimmer
Shimmer
White lights breaking
And fluid cries
She's reaching
Screeching
Imploring
Seething

And the haunting
Hurting
Spilling
No one knows
A kiss-like smile that leaves you beguiled
Fading darkness and the whisper of a ghost


5. BREATE

(Ka):
God is silent, only eyes from where I stand
Sundays eclipse the monumental scale of man
Life leaves us parent-less in a world I do not
Love
There's no causality for what I'm thinking

Of...

(Guardian Angel):
And I am the face you see within the mirror
And I am the hand that holds the fist away
And I am the dream forgotten in the morning
And I am.... I am.....

(Ba):
We are the faith of your tomorrows

Let us breathe, let us see, let us be...
We are your prayers engulfed in sorrow
Let us breathe, let us see, let us be... let us Be...

(Akh):
Oh God I only need to see,
To share this light,
To make this hope,

To make it me...

(Ka):
Life may leave us, stretched across the soul
We buried
Sundays moving slower when the loneliness
Sets in
And if our children die, before we reach our
Own demise,

Then life is blacker still, blacker than the
Blackest fire.

(Guardian Angel):
And I am the face you see within the mirror
And I am the hand that holds the fist away
And I am the dream forgotten in the morning
And I am.... I am.....

(Ba):

We are the faith of your tomorrows
Let us breathe, let us see, let us be...
We are your prayers engulfed in sorrow
Let us breathe, let us see, let us be... let us be...

(Akh):
Oh God I only need to see,
To share this light,

To make this hope,
To make it me...

(All)
Let us breathe, let us see, let us be... let us be...


6. REGRETS

This beautiful saint is bleeding, fall poi-
Son words as arrows fly, while distant
Thoughts intrude like poetry, some
Apprehension... and some regret.

Why can't it be like it used to be?
Why can't it be like it was?


Here i am thinking about you- whenever
I close my eyes I'm dreaming of you.
And if i have to live my life without
You forever, i can close my eyes and
Dream of you.

Life can be so cruel- take away these
Regrets

A shiny insect, just a plaything? have

You ever heard the butterfly cry?
Would you sacrifice beauty for the
Adrenaline? and would he hate you if he
Died?

Why can't it be like it used to be?
Why can't it be like it was?

Here i am thinking about you- whenever
I close my eyes I'm dreaming of you.

And if i have to live my life without
You forever, i can close my eyes and
Dream of you.


7. CONFUSION

I am the Angel
You are the hands that grab me
I am forgotten
And you are alone

Justification-
Perfect stimulation
Make me a treasure...
Make me a gun
I am the mountain
That watches the valley
Pretending the answer
Lies under my thumb
I am your secret

That makes you feel stronger
That makes you act colder
When I'm around
I am the Angel
You are the hatred
That has sipped my blood
And broken my wing
I am forgotten
But you are forgiven

Still I long for the sleep
That never comes to me
I am empty...
I am cold...
I am cold...


8. SYMPATHY (FOR TOMORROW)

I'm not asking for favors
Not tonight
I look up in the sky...
All the rockets fall down (fall down)
Too many promises
Too many lies

Too many faces for me to know

Sometimes I sit among the markers
And contemplate my next life
Says something less sympathetic-
"A little more unconditional respect was buried
Here"

"But it never lived
And it never died

It never came from them
It was always inside..."

I don't care if time just passes us by
I can stand the change...
But not the cruelty
Too many promises
Too many lies
Too many faces for me to know

Sometimes I sit among the markers
And contemplate my next life
Aays something less sympathetic-
"A little more unconditional respect was buried
Here"

"But it never lived
And it never died
It never came from them

It was always inside..."


9. ATEN-RA

(Rise Akhetaten)
I made the monument by his hand
A drifting sun in a foreign land
ATEN-RA, ANKH-IS-RA

IS-RA, IS-RA, ISRAEL

Angel of the One
His face has been denied
From all the inscriptions
But not from the sky
ATEN-RA, ANKH-IS-RA
IS-RA, IS-RA, ISRAEL

Who is God?

His name defies belief
For no One less wrought in Heresy?
ATEN-RA, ANKH-IS-RA
IS-RA, IS-RA, ISRAEL
ATEN-RA, ANKH-IS-RA
IS-RA, IS RA, ISRAEL?
ATEN-RA, ANKH-IS-RA
IS-RA, IS RA, ISRAEL?


10. DO YOU BELIEVE...

(Instrumental)


11.HEAVEN'S GAZE

Shades of feelings my heart denies

Bathing in shadows hidden in the eyes of lies
My glowing future now these embers burn
Uncanny restlessness- but ask me what I've
Learned...

Prey insect visions swarm about my head
Each haunted thought, and each prying wedge

Slice ripping pieces and shredding pages of life
If this is real- well it feels like hell! yes it feels
Like Hell!

Gods and angels and devils smile
Stare into our crying eyes
Fire in anger and hate beguile

But look into your heart tonight.

We disregard the cold pedestrian grey
Where level playing fields weren't meant for us
To play
As riddled failings salvation turns away
If this is real- well it feels like hell! yes it feels

Like Hell!

Gods and angels and devils smile
Look into our crying eyes
Fire in anger and hate beguile
But look into your heart tonight.

Gods and angels and devils smile
Stare into our crying eyes
Fire in anger and hate beguile
But look into your heart tonight.


12. HEART ON MY SLEEVE

Your eyes
They often lie
And leave me feeling
Misunderstood
Our tragedy

Plays out like a symphony
A breath and a whisper
Are your clues
Inside we shake
Because we're afraid
But we're certainly not afraid of you
These dreams instead
Who like a blanket
Has smothered me but still left me warm


I don't need sympathy
Or your apologies
Why don't you understand?
The face you see
Well it belongs to me
And I'm doing the best I can...

Just to make you smile
Just to make you smile

Again...

Faith, we're acting on courage alone
What will they do
When that's all through?
Dance in the dark
Sleeve pinned with a heart
Just to let you know
That we're in pain


I don't want sympathy
Or your apologies
Why don't you understand?
The face you see
Well it belongs to me
And I'm doing the best I can...

Just to make you smile
Just to make you smile

Again...

Every now and then you have to see
That the wall we've built has landed on me
Every now and then why don't we pretend
That things will come together in the end
Every now and then just open your eyes
Does every part of everything have to be right
Every now and then- so that after a while

I might get through and make you smile


13.THERE ARE SOME SECRETS...

(Instrumental)


14. NOTHING

I find you, lying fetal, knees pulled beneath

Your chin, alluring bite sings empty promises,
The entropy has pulled you in, your heart
Pounds, your breathing is labored, foolish
Things we do for fun, the world outside caving
Inward, now what have you done? what have
You done?

No life, No love, No dreams, No reason to remain,
No eyes, No vision, No pain, No, No Nothing, No

Mind, No thought, No sex, No awe to feel, No
Heart, No Nothing, No, No, No Nothing

Fingers numb, a hand is reaching, asking, begging
For a friend, your mouth is dry sting cotton frothing,
Spiral staircase towards the end, chest heaves and
You stop breathing, numeric punch keys 911, bad
Chemistry, organic weakness, now what have you
Done? what have you done?

The vortex brings you down
The vortex brings you in

No life, No love, No dreams, No reason to remain,
No eyes, No vision, No pain, No, No Nothing, No
Mind, No thought, No sex, No awe to feel, No
Heart, No Nothing, No, No, No Nothing


15. EVEN ANGELS FALL

Sorrow sings

Her kisses in silence
And adjusts the blinds to keep the light
From mocking everything I feel
She dances slowly
A silhouette upon the curtains
But her eyes seem to cry
Only empty tears
I beg for comfort with inadequate verse
It meant so much to me... and so little to her

And I am sinking into a mountain of self pity
Why can't I simply disregard all the things I feel?

"Where is my angel when I need him most?"
"Tell me now where did he go?"


16. MONUMENT

I never wrote you a love song
Somehow words could not express what I needed to say.
And so I never wrote you a love song
And now its much, much too late 'cause you've gone away

But I will build this monument
To remember all the love we once had

And I'll close my eyes and make it how it used to be
I swear I never stopped loving you with everything I am
And it hurts so much to think you stopped loving me
You stopped loving me...

So I wish I'd had written you a love song
And somehow you understood what it feels to be me
Because the Angel loves the sprite forever
And does it unconditionally


But I will build this monument
To remember all the love we once had
And I'll close my eyes and make it how it used to be
I swear I never stopped loving you with everything I am
And it hurts so much to think you stopped loving me
You stopped loving me...


17. DEATH/REUNITE

(Instrumental)

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